Yeah, it's old news but it's still relevant:
So apparently, Joaquin Phoenix has been advocating the YoTW behind my fucking back, hitting a level of commitment that I can't even pretend to score, considering I have neither the ability to grow mutton chops nor hypertrichosis.
I guess I don't really lose, though, because hairy-faced chicks are rarely, rarely considered premium tail. Then again, neither am I, for all these ridiculous reasons that I hear but just don't understand. Like "getting drunk" and "yelling unnecessarily" and "wearing horse sweatshirts" and "blogging" and "not showering" and "looking unsexy."
Still, if I were the type to meme shit up, and had to write a prescribed number of things for which I'm thankful, numbers 1-n would read: I am thankful that I do not have facial hair. Just warning you in advance.