Monday, April 13, 2009

Shadows in the Land of Rassles.

It's over. I have nothing left to believe in.

My boss, who I affectionately refer to as "Action Man" in my head and to his face, but only with a salute, because he runs everywhere and only speaks in exclamation-pointed His-Girl-Friday-Fast-Talk, See? is forcing me to do all of these horrible things that I don't feel comfortable doing.

Action Man
Monday, April 13, 20094:35 PM
To: Rassles
RE: BSF on Facebook!

Rossi, you on Facebook yet? Get on that, Missy!

Come see me when you have a few minutes. Website questions - what does this word mean?

I almost forgot! Go Cubbies! Have a cold one for me! But after work! Facebook!

- Action Man

Seriously, sir? Why you gotta be a raging bitch?

No, I am not going to be your friend.


Later addition, 6:45 PM: I signed up for Facebook and then immediately deleted my account. It feels wrong. In my soul. It just feels wrong.



A Free Man said...

Good call. I can't imagine anything worse that my boss wanting to be my friend on Facebook. Actually it would be worse if he wanted to be my 'friend' in real life. Those are the worst kind of bosses.

Rassles said...

Oh, I don't think you understand...I have to JOIN Facebook now, and help Admin the job's Facebook page.

Anonymous said...

The head of my department, who hasn't spoken A WORD to me in about 3 months, friended me. WTF. I accepted and then two weeks later unfriended everyone at my office. That's the good thing about can unfriend people without them knowing. Why don't bosses get this? They are such stupid fucks.

renalfailure said...

Action Man... nice Venture Bros. reference.

Could be worse, you could be working for King Gorilla.

~Mountain Lover~ said...

I wish my boss would tell me I had to be on facebook as a condition of my employment. instead I'm on it anyway, terrified I'll get caught.

My recommendation: Don't tell anyone you're on it and don't friend anyone otherwise you'll become an addict. That's the way you get lured in. One day you're created an account for a specific purpose, then the next you're friending people you didn't hate in high school.

Mia Watts said...

Damn conformists. Next you'll be to use smilies.

The Ambiguous Blob said...

Everybody else is doing it.

Mister Crowley said...

I feel for ya, woman. This here's what MY boss sent me one day:

"from: Bossman
to: Crowley
date: Thu, Aug 28, 2008 at 7:44 AM

dear dude,
what is facebook?is it useful?
i have downloaded itunes but i do not seem to know how to go to the store and buy the tunes.
will appreciate if you could come up and tell me about it.


Mrs. Booms said...

I can't do Facebook. My mother is all over FB.

And I just hate it.

A lot.

MoLinder said...

i told my sister about you possibly joining FB - she wanted to know why & I told her it was because of your job and networking, this is what she said: Hahahah poor rossi. She's the last person I associate "networking" with.
hurry up and add your profile already so i can befriend you and throw stupd crap at you, like snowballs.

Gypsy said...

Since the destruction of my happy-go-lucky life, I've pretty much given up on Facebook. It just seems... hollow.

Schmee said...

Suck it up. It's really not that terrible. I put the least amount of info possible on my page and pretty much just ignore everything but the friend requests cuz they make me feel cool...anyway, you must obey action man.

Thanatos said...

Hey, you missed out. Think of all pokes you could have gotten from him.

kaila said...

Facebook junkie here, my "old boss" from 3 years ago, the one who regularly touched himself while talking to people and ate his boogers, tried to friend me on FB. I laughed until I cried. Then I hit "ignore".

Anonymous said...

You know, you can never *really* delete a Facebook account... they keep it in their database, just in case you ever decide to go back.

Rassles said...

Franklin: I think I would rather just not do it in the first place. So lame.

RF: Actionactionactionactionaction.

Mount: It's a problem, you see, because I'm all like, "I should have 400 friends EASY on here." But I refuse to friend them. Seven friends it is.

Mia: Never.

Ambiblob: Which is as good a reason as any.

Crow: Tell him to go to Best Buy.

Boomer: Jesus, moms on Facebook? Weird.

MoLinder: Shut up.

Gypsy: It is hollow, and fake, and a big fat hairy lie. I'm on it.

Schmee: I know. I know.

Thanny: Zing.

Kaila: Good girl.

Gully: You are a bastard for pointing that out.

Bluestreak said...

Facebook sucks ballz. But for some reason I'm always on it. Be sure and never give me crack.