Once upon a time, there was a girl who was me. Once upon a time there was me, and I existed, and I wrote this blog entry about the inevitable epic summer that I was sure to experience, and then I wrote about how much summer sucks.
It is August 26th. Ish. And I want to take it back. I want to pretend I kept those words in my pocket where they fucking belong instead of waving around for the world to see, because I should know better. Jinx. I am a fucking jinxy Jinxer who jinxes her jinxes.
All summer has been autumn. Spring sprang right the fuck into fall, and normally the thought of such things would pump up the goodness as well as the jams, but I'm accustomed to my seasons. I need the sweaty discomfort of summer and having fun in spite of it, because it makes me enjoy the other seasons so much more. I need the sunshine. I want to ride my bike, I want to sit outside of bars for hours and watch people trip over themselves while they try so hard to impress strangers. I want to go on vacation. I always knew the weather was emotionally affective, but I never felt it so harshly before.
I wonder if this angry, bitter kick I've been on is related to Poppy? I'm sure it is. I've been out of my element ever since, and I'm preachy and mad which I do not like.
For the past two weeks, I've been leaving work at 8:30. Twelve hour days, skipping lunch, constant working and bullshit. I used to make sure I went for a walk outside during lunchtime, but lately I don't have time and the sun has decided to shun Chicago completely (due to my excessive jinxing). Yesterday my boss came back at the office after a dinner business meeting and jumped when he ran into me at my desk and demanded I leave. It's exhaustive.
Look at this, I'm even slacking on my blog.
Normally, I would write out the dialogue between my boss and I, outlining his erratic sentence fragments and dervish bustling while he drops his keys and makes me give him a solid fist bump, but instead I'm all, "Yesterday I worked late and my boss had to tell me to go home."
I'm just not feeling it at all. So, a note to all who care and probably saw it coming: I'm going on a blog break for a short while. Blog has become obligation. Very lame. Living isn't happening, and once I've geared up again I'll be back in force. Turn the jinx into hijinx. Promise.