Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Rock My Adidas, Never Rock Fila

"Rossi! Donation from Sieman, huh?" My boss, The Action Man, calls from down the hall. (Is there a word for like, powering up so you can properly snap into action? I might have to invent one. Actually, I think it's ackshinackshinackshinackshinackshin.)

I snicker. "Khkhkhkhkh - semen." (Okay, so khkhkhkhkh is my weak attempt at properly spelling out a snicker. In live oration, I am a professional Snickerer, and one never mistakes my snickering for anything, but on the internet it just looks like the call of Cthulhu. Also, I am twelve.)

Sure enough, Action Man steams around the corner like fucking turbine and points at me with a ferocious grin. "Rossi! Are you kickin' the new K-knowledge?"

I stop my snickering to gasp as he chugs past. "Sir! Did you just drop the science like Galileo dropped the orange?"

He turns at the door and winks. "I believe I just did."

"I can't believe you're all up in the Beastie Boys."

"Saw 'em in '88!" he yells from outside, and as the elevator dings onto our floor I can hear hammering out, "Right up to your face and diss you..."

My boss is excellent.

...

12 comments:

OG said...

I would like to work in a fun office again. It's tough to have those kind of interactions when you work in an office by yourself.

la isla d'lisa said...

I may have fallen a little in love with Action Man after today ...

daisyfae said...

i have no idea how to phoenetically type out a snicker, but yours is pretty close... i snicker like a 12 year old at every opportunity - many of them very inappropriate (like when i saw a fly buzzing around the funeral home at grandpa's visitation).

Kono said...

i do not sniff the coke, i only smoke the sinsemilla.

Logical Libby said...

I will trade my boss for your boss.

Blues said...

Right up to yo face and dissed ya.

Mister Crowley said...

I have a boss who, in fits of anger, goes "YOu say that ONE more time, and I'll throw my panties at you", and "YOu fuck that up, and I'll cut your balls off, you assholic lot".

She may have been a female rottwieler in a previous life.

Hello Rass. Long time.

Ellie said...

Mister C is perpetuating the undeserved, bad name of Rotteweilers!

I like your boss (better than mine).

renalfailure said...

I need a new job, so I'm going to put on my resume "Looking for a boss who can drop some phat beats."

Mia Watts said...

Your boss is totally excellent! Also, khkhkhkhkh sounds like you're clearing your throat. Or speaking some middle eastern dialect for love music.

Mae December said...

what just happened?

Mahjong said...

I like your boss to!!!